Archive for the ‘statistical updates’ Category

sol statistical update as of 7-8-06

Sunday, July 9th, 2006

sol statistical update as of 7-8-06

*****

# of days I worked in a row in late May thru June: 30

Average number of hours I was spending in the office per weekday: 11

# of alligators on the seat of my new cruiser (bike) given to me as a bonus from my boss: 7

The timing of my boss: impeccable

Average number of hours I still manage to put in on the dance floor per week: 16+

Number of inches of heel on my brand new (made just for salsa) dance shoes: 2.5

How I walk to work every day: barefoot

The expanse of my extremes: unexplained

The number of programs we (my company) have in the field (world) today: 23

The number of students to whom, if any slightest thing happens, warrants a call to the emergency “hot phone”: 200

Current location of that “hot phone”: my back pocket

Average local time in Boulder that corresponds to afternoon in Asia: 2:00am

Locations from where the hot phone has rang me awake in the last three nights: Rural Western China, Zanskar and the general South Western Himalayan regions.

What I’ve found emergency problem solving to secretly be: kinda fun

Status of that secret now I’ve disclosed it on the WWW: blown

Message to any of my viewing co-workers: Although I do admit it’s “kinda fun” I’m still done with my turn and ready to hand off the hot phone!

For a difficult task is: finding salsa outfits with a “hot phone” pocket.

The lesson number I’m on in Pimsleur’s French series: 38

Tenses I’m now able to speak: Present, past, future

Most interesting/questionable sequential set of phrases I’ve learned in the audio series: “Mon mari n’est pas ici. Il est en Amérique. Je voudrais aller à votre hôtel. Vous aiment le vin rouge?”

Translation: “My husband is not here. He is in America. I would like to go to your hotel. Do you like red wine?” (In that order!)

How the Pimsleur series promotes itself: “the most practical and efficient language learning tool”

Adjectives I’d certainly agree with: “practical” & “efficient”

Question I’m currently baffled by: “That there is no name, in English, for a dandelion that is no longer a yellow flower, but a seedy globe of stemy softness.”

Question I put forth to the international peoples reading this blog: “What’s the translation for the state of this flower (see picture above) named in other languages?”

The top 30 of 81 countries that sol.com site statistics says people are logging on from: US, Canada, UK, Australia, China, Belgium, Germany, France, Cyprus, Ecuador, Netherlands, Finland, Spain, Israel, South Korea, Turkey, India, Romania, Japan, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Italy, Hong Kong, Austria, Ghana, Malaysia, Peru, United Arab Emirates

Super cool site I recently registered on: www.couchsurfing.com

30 of 81 countries in which there are couches I want to surf: US, Canada, UK, Australia, China, Belgium, Germany, France, Cyprus, Ecuador, Netherlands, Finland, Spain, Israel, South Korea, Turkey, India, Romania, Japan, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Italy, Hong Kong, Austria, Ghana, Malaysia, Peru, United Arab Emirates

What I’m not-so-subtlety doing: hinting

And while I’m on the site statistics page; funniest “search strings” that led people to this site in June: “opps I did it again to your heart” “Dennis Rodman’s penis” “Peruvian jello cakes” “availability of Pepto Bismol in Spain” “Seoul hooker hill” “Does a koala travel alone or in a pack?” “hummmmm.com” “AMERICANMONKEYSAROUNDTHEWORLD.COM” “S.O.L. answers”

My status on which of the last three is a more appropriate name for my site: torn — in tears of laughter.

# of hospital couches I surfed last week: 3

# of airport couches I crashed (after missing my bus) last week: 1

# of days before my lease ends and I will be a homeless pilgrim couch-surfing around Boulder: 22

# of days before I will be a homeless pilgrim couch-surfing around France: 63

# of you that are “no fools” to the fact that I love being a homeless pilgrim: all

Latest country I’ve added to my fall travel itinerary (where the national language is also French): Senegal

Former French Colony in South India where I’ll be spending my winter holiday: Pondicherry

The apparent theme of my 2006/7 travels: French

# of couchsurfers (I met on www.couchsurfing.com) that I had staying at my apartment this week: 1

How cool she was on a scale of 1-10: 10

How much I love the randomness of online-backpacker-community: absurd amounts

Number of bypasses that were successfully stitched to my Dad’s heart: three

How grateful I am to all those who sent notes of support and love: extremely

Quality that describes how convenient it has been that my (secret) divine life plan has now allowed for me to be home for two family emergencies in the last 6 months: uncanny

What I find myself doing when I look up at the sky: winking back

% decrease in my workload now that our programs are out the door: 30 and increasing

% increase in my time to play, read, write and enjoy life in Boulder: 30 and increasing

What I plan to make a priority now that I again have the time: #3 in the list above

# of incredibly inspiring people who congregated in the Sierras of California for our instructor training camp that are dressed up in ridiculous outfits in the following photos: 70

State of my being in regards to the love I’m feeling for all the amazing communities (on, offline, home, work, salsa, solbeam.com, backpacking, Boulder) that surround me: overwhelmed

Around the time I need to stop sighing around and jump on my green cruiser to go hand off this hot phone: now! :)

———————————————
*sol bows her “namaste” and gratitude to World Nomads Travel Insurance, ThinkHost and MercuryFrog for their ever-supporting roles in the realization of her dream.

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sol statistical update: Darjeeling, India March 2005

Sunday, March 6th, 2005

sol statistical update: Darjeeling, India March 2005

Cost of my incredible lunch this afternoon of dahl baht, garlic naan, gohbi paratha and palak panner: 80 Rupees

US dollar equivalent of 80 Rupees: $1.84

US dollar value of eating lunch with your fingers: priceless

What never gets burned when you eat with your hands: your tongue

Average # of hours I study Nepali each day: 2.1

My dated goal for being fluent: 2006

How much easier it is to learn your 3rd language than your 1st and 2nd: considerably

How much easier it is to say that than do it: considerably

An extremely ambiguous adverb: considerably

Tenses I’ve learned in Nepali: past tense, present tense, future tense, command & formal/informal tenses

State of my mind: plain ol’ tense

How often bad puns have to happen: sometimes

When they should really be reserved for: old age, and more specifically, Dad-dom

Categories above to which I belong: neither

# of bad puns to come: 0

What you can do: sigh

One of the subjects we are currently studying with the students: karma

What I’ve decided I must have been in a past life to possibly deserve this one: a saint

Who, for me, currently holds saint status in THIS life, and is responsible for the lovely redesign of solbeam.com: Merc

To whom I send my gratitude, admiration, support and love: Merc

Status of chin on how I’ll ever be able to adequately repay such altruistic favors: still scratching

# of pairs of socks I’m currently wearing: 3

# of pairs of socks I brought with me: 4

# of days it takes for socks to dry on a clothesline without sun: 3

Who likes to believe that cold weather kills funk: me

Who might beg to disagree: my 2 co-leaders and 9 students

How many times I’ve explained the squat toilet procedure to our students: 3

My favorite “think-of-it-this-way” description: “it’s like a little bath for your butt”

Percentage that have actually converted from TP to water: 10%

Who you can’t win: them all

What time we all got up to watch the sunrise over Kachenjunga from Tiger Hill: 4:00am

# of Indian tourists taking pictures of the funny looking white travelers: > greater than the # of Indian tourists taking pictures of the sunrise

# of Indian family photo albums that have my smiling and random white face in them: numerous

Our group record (held by Suren) for our “momo” (delicious Tibetan treats) marathon competition: 56

My personal momo-muching record: 9

My current status: last and losing pathetically

But who came through last year and took first place in a Chai Challenge: the author of this update

Who, I’d like to remind, wins the raise in the end: the tortoise

# of cups of Darjeeling tea drunken during the composure of this update: 4

How to say, “where is the bathroom” in Nepali: “Toilet kahaa cha?”

What I’m currently studying and trying to incorporate into my daily living: The Buddhist Noble 8-Fold Path

What I’m stumbling on: Right Speech & Right Action

Specifically what I need to stop: Lying (harmlessly?) to my students and stealing their pens.

What one group of my students believed was my middle name for a month: “Jellybean”

Who my current group of students sang “Happy Birthday” to today: my co-leader

My co-leader’s birthday: December 28th.

Who has issues with abusing the trust of her students: Um. Me.

# of waiters looking over my shoulder reading my journal right now: 1

# of days our group will be trekking up the Eastern Nepal-India border (“Singalila Ridge“) this week: 9

# of days I’ll be without internet access during that time: 9

The last time I had 9 days without internet access: the last time I went trekking for 9 days in the Himalayas

# of snake charmers I ran into on the street today: 2

# of opportunities one usually has to say that in a life time: not enough!

A story from my travels in India last year that I recently broke down crying about while recounting: “At Her Feet”

How much shame I have for crying these days: none

What I’ve realized is worth being embarrassed about in life: nothing

What I think is the biggest key to self-love: self-forgiveness

# of sol statistical updates posted since 2000: 6

In what countries and where you can click to read them: Ecuador, Thailand, Guatemala, Honduras and even my first (and so embrassing and thus self-forgiving/loving) statistical update from Costa Rica from five years ago!

# of new pictures in the India Album: 15

What I just realized was a hint that the café is now closing and not an attempt to read my journal: the waiter standing over my shoulder!

*****

(world photogallery)&nbsp(about sol)&nbsp(some stories)&nbsp(LeapNow.org)&nbsp(travel disclaimer)&nbsp(packing list)&nbsp (photogallery guestbook)&nbsp (blogger profile)&nbsp(World Nomads Travel Insurance)&nbsp(WhereThereBeDragons.com)

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sol statistical update

Wednesday, September 15th, 2004

How long it’s been since I’ve submitted a sol statistical update: too

# of days since arrival in Ecuador: 103

# of days I thought my Ecuadorian visa permitted me to stay: 90

# of days I realized I was permitted after staying 90 days: 30

Status of my residency in Ecuador: illegal

# of hours an illegal visitor can stay in Ecuador before being deported: 24

Requirements for getting an Ecuadorian Immigration officer to extend a visa to an illegal: begging, sad eyes and 40 cents

What I am not beyond: begging, sad eyes and 40 cents

How often I have to take a 9-hour bus ride to Quito to renew my visa: 1/month

Term I used to describe that requirement to the Immigration officer: “re-ridiculoso”

# of minutes he shuffled papers and looked blankly at me before I left: 7

# of minutes it took for me to fall in love with a scrap-rat kitten covered in grease and shivering from cold and hunger at a gas station where my bus broke down last week: 3

# of minutes before I had it wrapped in my blanket and ready to take home: 4

# of times it has jumped on this keyboard in the last three minutes: 22

Secret coded message direct from the paw of my moon rat “luna”: irk,jf2ARE

Why I call her my “moon rat”: see image above

How many trees I’ve planted this week: 45 Ceibo and 75 Fernan Sanche

How many 9-year olds I took on an ecology tour to identify native plant species: 12

How many times my whack-Spanish resulted in the pronunciation of “vaina” (seed pod) as “ballena” (whale): 8

How many confused faces turned to look at the ocean each time I instructed them to inspect the seed pods on a tree: 12

New beach activity I’ve taken up in my spare time: Poi fire dancing

# of bloody noses I’ve since incurred in my (unlit) practice sessions: 1

How ready I am to light the balls: not-so-much

Total of ALL my living expenses for last month: $100 (room in exchange for volunteer work, $10/week for food, $60/month for internet, bus rides, meals out and all other “extras”)

Types of “life debilitating disabilities” overcome by persons of whom I have encountered in the last month in order to follow their traveling dreams: Insulin-dependent Diabetes, Epilepsy and Fibromyalgia.

Of the three, % that are keeping a weblog documenting their journey: 33.33

How inspired I am by these people: jaw-droppingly

Estimated days I have left in Ecuador before my visa expires: 60

Next destination: Colombia

Official response of parents when I cautiously alerted them of this itinerary: “Have fun!”

Reaction of myself in response to un-reaction of parents: disbelief

Status of whether there is anything I can do that will still shock my parents: Questionable

What I’m eating as I type: popcorn covered in nutritional yeast

What Kingdom yeast comes from: it’s an undecided, but ongoing debate at our house

Is this actually what we discuss over dinner: Yes. (I live with vegan ecologists!)

Percent chance the reader cares: 1%

Message to the 1%: We’re leaning towards the Fungi Kingdom

How many digital cameras that have, to date, been either robbed, monsooned, upgraded or mysteriously died on me since I started this adventure: 9 (I think)

Status of number 10: On its way to its doomed (but exciting) existence in Ecuador!

Compliments of: One of my favorite people in the world. (picture coming)

Degree of gratitude I have for her giving spirit: 360

# of reality-shattering, earth-quaking experiences had while sitting on some rocks overlooking the ocean last weekend: 1

Estimated amount of time before I’ll be able to find the words to describe (or know!) what happened: Indefinite

# of neighborhood girls screaming outside my window right now that they want to visit Luna the moon rat: 6

% chance I’ll pawn her off on one of them: 80

Status of fingers: crossed

# of new pictures in the Ecuador Album: 24

(sol’s travel photos) (about sol) (some sol stories) (LeapNow.org) (travel disclaimer) (packing list) (photogallery guestbook)

Posted in ecuador, statistical updates | 1 Comment »

sol statistical update: Thailand, August 2002

Saturday, August 31st, 2002

Sol Statistical Update for Thailand: 8/31/2002
Reason for not blogging: Excessive Fun

Status of motorbike accident wounds: Infection

Reasons allowing time for composure of this Blog: 90% Monsoon, 10% Exhaustion from excessive antibiotic drugs

Frequency of pill-popping: Every 4 hours

How much I am personally contributing to the human race’s increased resistance to antibiotics: Unfair Amounts

# of Elephants I was hopping to trek on today: 1

Chances of cancellation due to monsoon: 80%

Approximate weight of Thai woman who trampled on my back last night in a 1-hr Thai full body (as in THEY use THEIR full body) massage: 135 lbs

Approximate number of elephants it now (this morning) feels like trampled over my back last night: 20

Cost of Thai massage per hour: US $4 dollars

Companions in Pi Pi Islands: 2 Strikingly Handsome Frenchmen

>

How Much They Paid Me to use those Adjectives: Undisclosed

# of facial attacks by baby monkey: 1 (captured on camera and coming to a photogallery near you)

Scars to Show for it: Only Mental

# of Postcards found that have a picture of my exact bungalow on it: Countless

Cool factor of that: Extreme

# of rumored Unexplained Deaths in Bungalow L16 (next door to mine): 1

Condition of mattress upon inspection by traveler who thought it was a lie and wondered why the best bungalow on the beach was unoccupied: Blood-soaked

# of maps found: 0

Bad joke in reference to the movie “The Beach” (that was filmed here): see above

# of Padlocks added to the door of L16 after I questioned the reception desk as what occurred in the bungalow: 2

Status of Mystery: Unsolved

# of Travelers who share with me the right-leg-motorbike-muffler-burn “tattoo of Thailand”: 1 in 4

How many of those who sport the same “tattoo” who give me the “nod” of mutual condolence *and idiocy*: 1 in 4

# of Scuba dives made off the Pi Pi Islands: 2


Me & My Divemaster

Visibility: Absolute shit

Hypothesis as to what the diving is most likely like ON-season (i.e, NOT now): Exceptional

What is used to serve the Thai special Red Bull & Rum concoction at bars: A bucket and 5 straws

Implications of ordering drinks in buckets: Nauseous rides home in Long Tail boats and deathly hang-overs.

Cure for deathly hang overs: Beach, Bungalow and a splash of lime.

Funny-Ass-Sign that I *regrettably* was unable to get my camera out fast enough to capture: “Next Right: Monkey Training College” (Yes. They actually have them to train the monkeys to harvest coconuts.)

# of Pictures awaiting uploadation: 50+

Date “Uploadation” was added to the Sol Dictionary: 8/31/02

Average # of Israelis that approach me speaking in Hebrew each day: No less than 5

# of Baht that one Israeli was willing to bet that I was actually from Israel and traveling incognito as an American tourist: 500 Baht

Price of a full day snorkel excursion to 7 different sites including all equipment and meals: 450 baht

What the Israeli swore was a conclusive indicator of my Israeli origin: My Feet

Audio Level of the Rain that is coming down now as I type: Totally Deafening

Chance that my Elephant Trek has been cancelled: 95%

Time Due for my next elephant-sized Antibiotic pill: Immediately

Quick Mid-Term Report Card for Thailand before I pass out from Exhaustion:

Ease of Travel: A+

Quality of Food: A+

Beauty of Beaches: A+

Safety: B+

Cleanliness: B

Amount of Extracurricular Activity Options (etc. Diving, Kayaking, Elephant and Other Treks, Buddhist Meditation Centers, Rock Climbing, etc.): A+

Cost of Travel: A+ (by far the cheapest I’ve ever come by)

Cultural Learning & Level of Interaction with Thai people: D+

Comments: Thailand is at the VERY top of my list of countries I will return to for a more extensive amount of time 1: because of the scores on factors 1-7 above and 2: in attempt to to raise the score on factor 8, which simply necessitates more time than my allowed 2 wks.

Pictures coming soon….

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tri-annual solbeam statistical update

Tuesday, February 26th, 2002

Tri-Annual Solbeam Statistical Update

– As of 26, February 2002

# of Months on the Road = 11

# of Suspicious Skin Infections in 11 Mos. = 3

# of Digital Cameras Donated to the Guatemalan Black Market = 3

# of Persons reported in a Kidnapping for Ransom in the City Yesterday = 3

$$$ Amount of Ransom asked to Return the Abducted = 3000 Quetzales

3000 Quetzales Equivalent in US dollars = $375.00

How Much I’m Kidding About That Figure = Not At All

% of People I Know on First Name Basis at the Bar on any Given Night = 85

% of Those People Who Give me the “Tip-The-Bottle” More-Alcohol-Please-Because-I-Know-You Signal = 80%

How Annoying That Is = Extremely

How Much I Long to Be Salsa-ing Instead of Behind the Bar = Desperately

How Many Doubts I’d Rather Be Traveling than Working on Weekends = Without

How Many Reasons I Needed to Quit Working at the Bar = 3

Things I’ve Suddenly Realized That I’ve Forgotten in the Last 11 Months = What My Old *nice* Watch Looks Like, How Much a Beer Costs in San Diego, My Way Around PhotoShop

How Long It’s Been Since I’ve Driven a Car = 11 Months

How I’ve Learned to Fall Asleep in a Chicken Bus = Standing Up

How Many Dance Floors I’ve Broken a Floor Board In = 1

How Many Times I’ve Been Electrocuted in Central America = 4 (Story Coming)

How Many Times I’ve Gotten on the Wrong Bus in Central America = 1

How Many Times I’ve Gotten on The Wrong Plane in Central America = 1 (Story Coming)

# of Avocados I Eat a Day = 1.5

$$ of 1 Avodcado = .75Q or 10 cents US

How Many Nightmares I’ve Had About Returning to the States = 3

How Many Times I’ve Cried in the Last 11 Months = 0

Next Time I Will Cry = March 26th, 2002

Date I Leave Guatemala = March 26th, 2002

How Many Cups of Coffee I’ve Drunken Whilst Writing This = 2

How Many Minutes I Spent Contemplating if “Drunken” is a Word = 2

Conclusion on the word “Drunken” = Suspicious

# of Apologies to My 16 Years of English Teachers = Many

Where I Was Last Weekend = Surfing Competition in Sipicate (Beach on the Pacific of Guatemala)

What Place I Took = 2nd

Degree of Truth in that Claim = None

What I Really Did Learn = How to Body Board

How Much Fun That Was = Wickedly Fun

How Many Pictures I Took Over the Weekend = 20+

When Today I Will Hopefully Post Them = Later

Recipe For My Daily “Piece of Heaven” Shake: 1 Frozen Banana, 1/2 cup milk, 2 tbls sugar, 3 tbls powdered vanilla flavoring, 1/2 cup dry mosh

How Often I Have to Fight with My Roommates for the Blender Now that I’ve Shared with Them How to Make This Shake = Daily

What I Drink Behind the Bar: Lemon Juice, Salt, Tomato juice, *stir*, Soda Water and Ice (“Suero con Tomate”)

Facial Expressions of all Those Who Taste It: Scowls and Grimmaces

Recipe for a Very Nice Pina Colada: Ice, Pina Juice, Dark Rum, Kaluah, Milk *shake, drain*, Cinnamon on Top

How Many Limes I Have to Cut and/or Squeeze Each Night Before Work = Countless

How Many Calluses I Have on My Hands From the Knife I Use = 2

What the Term “Enron” Means to Me = Nothing

What the Term “Freedom” Means to Me = Everything

How Often I Question and Challenge the Ideals of American Society: Constantly

How Much I Desire a Picket Fence, Nice Car or White Wedding: Zill, Nilch and Nada

How Much Uncertainty Lies in My Future = A Great Deal

How OKAY I Am with That = A *Surprisingly* Great Deal

How Many Miles I Ran This Morning = 5

How Many Consecutive Turns I Can Make Salsa-ing = 5

How Many Fingers I Have On My Right Hand = 5

How Many of the Letters on this Keyboard are Written in with White-Out = 13

Stats I’m Starting To Write = Nonsense

Time For Me To Go = Now

Page # Where My Bookmark is in “The Lord of The Rings” trilogy = 81

What *wonderful* Quote From Which I Leave You With:

The Road goes ever on and on

&nbsp&nbsp Down from the Door where it began.

Now far ahead the Road has gone,

&nbsp&nbsp And I must follow, if I can,

Pursuing it with eager feet,

&nbsp&nbsp Until it joins some larger way

Where many paths and errands meet.

&nbsp&nbsp And whither then? I cannot say.

– J.R.R Tolkien

Posted in guatemala, honduras, statistical updates | No Comments »

scanhappy – a statistical update

Sunday, January 20th, 2002

Scan-Happy!

Anybody out there remember back in March ´01 when I did a short stint working in an internet cafe? Well one of the former-employee-benefits that I just uncovered is free scanning! Yeah! So I´ve uploaded 30 or so new pictures to the following albums: Living Antigua, Honduras — Bay Islands, and The Yucatan, MEXICO

Scanning, by the way, NORMALLY cost me one of the blue-backs pictured below:

The Guatemala Living Costs Menu

(Currently there are 8 Quetzales to a US dollar.)

*pulls chair out for you and hands you the “carta”*

Cerveza (Gallo or Moza) = 9 Q

Single room in a Hostel = 30 Q

Taxi across town = 20 Q

1 Hour of Internet = 12 Q

8 Smokin Hot Tortillas right off the grill = 1Q

“Un Mano” or “One Hand” *ie 5* of Avacados = 10 Q

Happy Meal at McDonalds = 28 Q

Bus Fare to/from Guatemala City/Antigua = 4.5 Q

Tourist Shuttle Fare to/from Guatemala/Antigua = 56 Q

Jar of Peanut Butter = 50 Q

My Salary for One Night at my old Bar = 40 Q

My Salary at the Discoteque I work at now = 75 Q

My tips Last Night = 75 Q

Monthy Earnings of a Street Vendor = 300 Q

Cost of a Hand Made Hammock Chair = 100 Q

Cost of school supplies necessary to send a child to school = 300 Q

(Of the children selling trinkets in the park, 90% can´t cant AFFORD to go. Our project pays these costs.)

Fake Rolex Watch = 60 Q

Street Meal = 10 Q

1.5 Liter Bottled Water = 6 Q

1 Coke = 4 Q

3 Hour Guided Hike up Volcan Pacaya = 45 Q

Month Membership at Local Gym = 150 Q

Cost to take a Picture of a Traditionally Dressed Mayan = 5 Q (or 2 Q per person if in a group)

1 Night in the Hotel that Bill Clinton stayed in = 1000 Q

Admission into the Movies in a Nice Theater = 30 Q

Admission into “the Movies” in a room with a TV = 12 Q

A Used Tom Robbins Novel = 25 Q

A Really Scetchy Hair Cut = 40 Q

A Leather Man Tool Hair Cut = 0 Q

Now you´ll have to excuse me. My shift here in the cafe is over, the sun is ringing me and it´s a rather urgent call that I must attend to…. :) Hasta Pronto!

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stats continued

Monday, September 17th, 2001

Three more important stats…

Number of Days Since Solbeam.com has Been Updated = 15+

*groan & smack*

Number of Times I Hit Myself in the Forehead Groaning Over the Above Stat = 23+

*groan & smack*

Number of Digital Cameras Stolen = TWO

*groan & smack*

*****

There is no appropriate place to start, so I´ll stop with all the self abuse and just jump right in with a jumbled bullet-point-mess of an update:

·Yup. The *second* digicam is gone. I´m over it. But I´ve been humbled into acceptance of the law of the digi-cam gods… “Sol shall NOT own a digicam in Central America” *lightning strikes, thunder booms*

· SOMEHOW I´ve found myself back in Antigua, Guatemala again (aka “The Land of Fast & Cheep Internet”). Solbeam.com is back in business. No more pictures, but lots more updates full of meaningless babble. Kinda like that big generic bag of “Fruity-Loopies” that you can find on the very bottom shelf of the cereal isle. Less buck, more bite. Or something lame like that.

· Yes. I will comment on the current state of chaotic events from the perspective of an American abroad who´s spent the last week straight discussing the subject with non-americans. Give me a few days… from the looks of it, this war isn´t going anywhere for at least three.

· After three months of severely limited internet/e-mail access, I have finally been able to take an extended dip into my inbox. The current is strong and the visibility “nil”, so please be patient while I swim through this mess and compose replies. 15 disks of *the last!* digital pictures to be uploaded tomorrow.

Ack. Just found out my friend´s flight back to The States was cancelled for like the 6th time. Gotta go find her….

To be continued….

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5-mo statistical update

Sunday, August 26th, 2001

5 Month Sol Statistical Update

# of Months since Arrival in Central America = 5

Bottles of SPF 30 used in 2 Mo. = 2

# of Barracuda Seen Underwater = 40

# of Barracuda Dinners Eaten = 5

Level Of Guilt Felt = Moderate, but overridden by hunger

# of Shark Sightings = 2

# of Panicked Fundivers as a result of Shark Sightings = 1

# of Times Swimming with Dolphins = 2

New Favorite Animal = The Dolphin

Current Number of Logged Dives = 94

# of Articles of Clothing Allowed on 100th Dive = 0

Deepest Dive Made = 180ft

How Many Feet over PADI Recommended Regulations that is: 50ft *shhh*

Piercings as of 6/28/01 = 2

Piercings as of 8/25/01 = 4

Piercings as of today = 3 (Nose diamond fell out. Too lazy to put it back in.)

How Many Times Rebecca “The Human Hole Puncher” tried to pierce my navel b/f it worked: 4

How much that Hurt = Significantly

# of Hermit Crabs I’ve Found in my Bedroom = 3

# that I’ve Accidentally Stepped on and Killed = 1

# of Times I’ve Spoken to My Parents Since my Departure = 0

How Terrible of a Daughter I am = Very

Average Amount of Shooting Starts One Can Witness in 60 Seconds on a Dock in Utila = 6

Overall Increase in Amount of Time Spent Stargazing = 800%

Score on the Divemaster Physics Exam = 85%

Number of Days It Took for me to Re-forget the Physics Formulas = .25

# of Times I’ve been Thrown into the Ocean with all my Clothes on = 3

# of People I’ve Thrown in With all Their Clothes on = 2

Places I’m Considering Traveling to in the Next 2 Months = Ecuador, Mexico or France

Reputable Method that will be Used to Determine that Destination = Ennie-Meny-Miny-Mo

How Many “All-Nighters” I’ve Pulled (followed directly by Diving) = 4

Best Cure for a Hang-over = Deep Diving

Current Tolerance for Alcohol = HIGH

# of Weeks it’s Been since I’ve Used a Telephone or Driven a Car = 20 Weeks

% of Time Spent Barefoot in Last 2 Mos.= 99

Feet Are Tough Enough to Walk on = Broken Glass

How Far Away I Feel From my “Pre-Travel” Reality = Light Years

# of Times Each Day I Say to Myself , “My Life is SO Good” = 8+

# of BEST College Mates Flying into Utila this Week = 2

How Much Trouble We’re Going to Get Into = Obscene Amounts

Status on PADI Divemaster Program = Successfully Completed and Certified

Number of Days Left on Utila = 6

Rating, on a Scale of 1-10, of my 2 Mos. on Utila = 15

Next Destination = Neighboring Island, Roatan

Next Time I’ll Be Able to Post = Unknown At This Point in Time

How Many Disks of Pictures Yet to be Uploaded = 15

Number of New Pictures Added to the Utila PhotoGallery Today = 10

*TinkerBell’s Wand Jingles*

Please turn the page. Now entering….

Chapter 5 — Roatan and Beyond…

*blows the dust off her backpack and smiles*

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